youareyoungdarling.blogspot.com - Having just returned from the Crappy Little Trailer in the Spooky Forest to the Gothic Mansion, civilization and the internet, the insomniac is finally getting around to writing about last week's Zombie Survival Race in Cochrane. The sister-in-law had arrived from Israel earlier that week and was invited along, little realizing the somewhat underhanded purpose for said invite was to provide the insomniac with her own personal meat-shield.
Devious or not, it seemed a foolproof plan. But after looking closely at the SIL and questioning why a Zombie would choose to run down a tall, slender quick-footed woman without an ounce of excess flesh as its prey over the insomniac - a short, pudgy treat with bad knees and plenty of extra meat on her bones, she started doubting the plan's effectiveness. Eventually concluding that Zombies are less interested in human flesh and more interested in large brains, she decided the plan was, indeed, foolproof.
 |
| She's not nearly as frightened as she should be. Considering her situation, and all ... |
The day was hot and almost cloudless; we arrived promptly at 10:00 a.m. in an attempt to avoid the high temperatures forecast for later. Even at that early hour, parking was already at a premium. There was a nice mix of Zombies, Runners and Spectators that day ... surely it was the thrill of seeing the Undead at such close range that lured people in such large numbers.
 |
| A few of the Zombies required chains, for the protection of the spectators. But they were treated humanely and given water. Even a Zombie needs to stay hydrated ... |
 |
| Looks like somebody indulged in a few too many brains the night before ... Or she has heat stroke. Hard to say. |
 |
| It's NEVER too early to start training the offspring how to prepare for the Zombie Apocalypse ... |
 |
| Ooooh look, Daddy! It's a Zombie! |
 |
| Pick me up! Pick me up! It's a Zombie! |
 |
| The Rocking Dead runners ... Rock on soon-to-become-Zombies dudes and dudettes. Rock on. |
 |
| This group were both Spectators AND Zombies. It's good to mix it up a little. Keeps everyone on their toes ... |
 |
| He's with the military. The REAL CANADIAN MILITARY. This is their new uniform. No word of a lie. |
 |
| This chap was an enigma. Neither a Zombie nor Daniel Boone reincarnated. Or was he? |
 |
| Doin' it Gangnam Style ... |
 |
| Exhausted from doin' it Gangnam Style ... |
 |
| The Horde, patiently waiting for the first of the runners to make it to the pen after their 5 km run ... |
 |
| Note the look of eager anticipation on this Zombie's face, as she tries to capture the runner's strategically placed “life” ... |
This dramatic video taken by runner TheJuicefoLife, captures the terrifying experience of trying to outrun the Zombies ...
After watching the race for a while, we headed to the food trucks. Trying to make a good impression on the sister-in-law, the insomniac refrained from having the southern fried chicken on a waffle topped with bacon and maple syrup, and finishing it all off with a massive selection of sugary goodness from The Sugar Cube. Because if the SIL hadn't been there, you know that's exactly how it would have gone down.
 |
| A mobile candy vendor? Does it get any better than that? |
 |
| Look at those sugar-fueled smiles ... |
Instead, we went to Avatara and indulged in some very healthy and extremely tasty fire-roasted organic felafel chips with hummus - which went down very well with a cold beer, and didn't contribute to the accumulation of any extra meat on the insomniac's already well-stocked bones. Always a bonus ...
 |
| Avatara is a mere stone's throw away from the Gothic Mansion. The insomniac already knows the menu by heart ... |
Obviously, the high point of any beer garden is the beer. Village Brewery was in attendance with their mobile unit - the insomniac tried Blacksmith - a sturdy, hand-forged India black ale, while the sister-in-law ordered Wit - an unfiltered wheat ale in the Belgian tradition. The entire collection of Village beer is available at the Sobey's Liquor Store in Cochrane, making it very convenient to stop on the way out of Calgary before heading to the Crappy Little Trailer in the Spooky Forest and grab a case or two. Possibly three.
 |
| The sister-in-law was the very first person in line for a cold beer. Don't let her try to convince you otherwise. The insomniac never lies ... |
 |
| They look like they could use a drink ... |
 |
| Serving and protecting. And drinking some beers ... |
In spite of the blistering heat, it was an awesome event. And although there were a few comments from the Runners that the Zombies were too aggressive, there were an equal number of comments from the Zombies that the Runners were too aggressive.
The only complaint the insomniac had was that EVERY table in the beer garden needed an umbrella. If she'd been smarter and hit the beer garden at 11:00 a.m. instead of waiting until noon, they might have gotten a shaded table and been able to stay long enough to enjoy a sample of each style of beer. Of course, the sister-in-law thought it a little chilly compared to back home, and was very glad she'd worn a long-sleeved shirt.
And by the time we left the event to head back to the trailer, the insomniac had already decided that construction of a very high barricade to keep out the Undead Horde wasn't really necessary; right up until the spouse pointed out the large deposit left by the grizzly that had wandered up the road a mere 10 feet from his chair the night before. So the barricade isn't totally off the table yet ...
 |
| Maybe it is Zombie Scat. Again, hard to say. |
Until next time, the insomniac wishes you nights of blissful sleep filled with pleasant dreams. Goodnight, my pretties.
IA
PostScript: Unfortunately, none of the Zombie-related stock the insomniac ordered to sell at the event arrived in time. It's now in the Attic filed under Giftware. Because Zombie-related stuff obviously makes for a lovely gift, right?
0 Response to "THE UNDEAD ARE, SURPRISINGLY, GOOD PEEPS ..."
Posting Komentar